Family dynamics can be intricate and often lead to complexities in relationships, particularly among siblings. While some maintain a close bond, others may drift apart due to various factors.

It's not always easy to accept, but human beings are complex creatures, and primitive emotions such as jealousy and rivalry often lie at the heart of these issues. As they age, siblings may choose to sever ties rather than confront deep-seated feelings that have accumulated over time.

Feelings of resentment, perceived favouritism, or neglect can be challenging to navigate, leading to siblings ignoring each other in their adult lives. Psychologists have been delving into this subject for years, and experts have identified several potential causes for sibling estrangement.

Favoured children

Did your family have a "golden" child? This could often be the youngest sibling or, in some cases, the eldest who seemed to be the favourite growing up, reports the Mirror US.

Regardless of birth order, the less troublesome child who is easier to handle might be favoured - or seem to be. For the other sibling(s), this can sow seeds of deep resentment, leading to negative feelings in adulthood.

Regrettably, such resentment can be toxic to sibling relationships, and unresolved feelings and issues around favouritism can lead to severed ties in later life.

Age gaps

Age differences can impact sibling relationships as shared life experiences may be limited. Studies indicate that siblings with an age gap of six years or more often have less in common - though this isn't always the case, and some may remain close.

However, a lack of shared experiences during childhood can result in indifference in adulthood and potential estrangement. An age gap doesn't necessarily mean siblings won't get along as adults, but for some, it is a factor leading to reduced interaction or no communication in later life.

Trauma

For many, childhood is not remembered with happiness and joy. Some people have few carefree memories from being a kid, which can make adulthood painful too.

Severe cases of trauma could include abuse by a sibling, which understandably will lead to some cutting an abuser out of their life. This kind of trauma can cast a dark shadow over the future, and many will need counselling for anything this serious.

But other distressing experiences such as parents separating or a family member's death - especially one close to you - can be hard to bear, and these drastic changes can strain relationships in childhood.

An unsettled childhood, marked by frequent house moves, can put a strain on children, with different personalities reacting in various ways. One child might become introverted and melancholic, while another may express their distress through unruly behaviour - leading to a breakdown in communication and potential estrangement between siblings.

It could be easier for siblings to lose contact entirely rather than revisit painful memories. Disconnecting in adulthood might seem less challenging than attempting to communicate after experiencing such distressing events.

Feeling neglected

If there was a constant struggle for attention during childhood, you might have felt ignored in the scramble for parental or caregiver attention. This can result in insecurities and deep-seated resentment in adulthood if not addressed.

Feeling overlooked within your family can lead to low self-esteem later in life, as well as feelings of resentment towards siblings perceived as more favoured. This could cause siblings to sever ties, with the more popular one potentially feeling guilty.

Similarly, a sibling who felt excluded and neglected might prefer to lose contact rather than confront difficult emotions. Perhaps it seemed like a constant fight for attention during childhood, leaving adult siblings unable to overcome feelings of inequality.

Psychology Today magazine offers a beacon of hope with its guidance, stating: "Becoming aware of the exclusion that happened, with an understanding of the impact it had on you then and now, can help you reduce unwarranted self-blame. You are not deserving of the treatment you endured. You deserve to feel loved, valued, and included. While you may not have felt this in your childhood home, you can cultivate it now."

Bullying and Teasing

What starts as sibling rivalry can take a dark turn into bullying when it involves continuous ridicule, physical aggression, or emotional torture, such as cruel teasing. The consequences of these severe actions often haunt affected children far into adulthood.

Victims harbour deep-seated hurt and resentment from enduring such toxic sibling behaviour and are left with a scarred perception of what should have been nurturing relationships.

For many, cutting off communication later in life is a protective measure against further psychological harm.

Recognising this unfortunate reality, it's vital to foster respect and unconditional love among siblings early on to prevent these detrimental impacts on their lives and relationships.

Different Lives, Different Personalities

Some siblings are so dissimilar that they embark on entirely different life journeys. This could be due to their contrasting personalities or differing interests, leading to distinct life choices.

As they transition into adulthood, these siblings may find it challenging to maintain a close bond and might even sever ties due to the difficulty in communication. The divergence in their life outcomes can cause them to drift apart, making it hard to rekindle their closeness.

Ineffective communication

Conflict is an unavoidable aspect of all relationships, including those between siblings. However, how we handle these conflicts significantly impacts the health of our relationships, and poor conflict resolution skills can create problems among siblings.

In families where open conversation and conflict resolution aren't encouraged, minor disagreements can quickly escalate into significant disputes. Harsh words are spoken, feelings get hurt, and no one truly emerges victorious.

Children brought up in such environments often lack the necessary skills to effectively express their emotions or navigate disagreements. This inability to resolve conflicts can persist into their adult relationships, including those with their siblings.

Adults often choose to withdraw and stop communicating when faced with disagreement or conflict, rather than directly addressing the issue. This avoidance pattern can lead to prolonged periods of silence and alienation between siblings.

Fewer shared positive experiences

A lack of shared positive experiences can also contribute to sibling estrangement. While positive memories can strengthen sibling bonds, their absence can have the opposite effect, potentially leading to estrangement.

Not all siblings share a strong emotional bond that lasts forever.

In childhoods marred by conflict or trauma, siblings may find it difficult to form enduring strong bonds. Without positive memories, siblings tend to drift apart due to the lack of a strong emotional connection.

It is therefore crucial for parents and caregivers to strive to create as many positive shared experiences as possible, in the hope that siblings can maintain close relationships into adulthood.